Dodgers Fans

Not nearly enough can be said about the utter stupidity of this fan base. Whether it's their insouciant insistence on showing up in the 3rd and leaving in the 8th or their obsession with batting around beach balls like autistic children distracted by butterflies.

Then, of course, there's the general lack of understanding or appreciation for the game of baseball. There's no hallmark for a front-running, ignorant fan base than one that boos a pitcher checking a runner for the first time. I understand booing on the second, third, fourth times, but there's absolutely no reason to boo on the first throw. It's an integral part of baseball to either nab a greedy baserunner or shorten his lead. Repeated throws can slow the pace of the game, but booing on one throw is irritating and uncalled for. In addition to this herd of retards (read: entire crowd), you have idiots like the guy who stood behind me heckling Joe Blanton. Eventually I had to respond and our exchange went like this:

Queef: "HEY JOE! HOW'S THAT ERA BABY? YEAH I HOPE THEY PUT YOU IN! GAME OVER!"
Q: "HEY JOE! WHY AREN'T YOU A STARTER ANYMORE? STILL HURT? YEAH TOO MANY LOSSES MAYBE"
Me: "Man, Blanton's ERA was around 4 [4.05] and he was the Phils' most consistent starter."
Q: "Yeah, but he went like 4-12."
Me; "Nah, he had a winning record. More like 12-10 [12-8]."
Q: "Nah, he lost like his first 7 games and went like 10-9."
Me: "No he didn't. You have no idea what you're talking about."

Blanton went 4-3 in his first 7 decisions and remained injury-free for the season.

No post about Dodgers fans would be complete without mentioning the foundation of this esteemed fan base, the magma at the center of their planet, the nucleus of their atom, the Glenn Beck of their hysteria: the Mexican thug. Easily the most classless of all baseball fans, these dudes show up to the game to toss beach balls, threaten opposing fans, and throw gang signs. There is report after report of men, women, and children being harassed in addition to not-infrequent stabbings and shootings on stadium grounds. While walking to the bathroom in the middle of the 8th I had a passer-by comment, "Fuck the Pheelies. Yo ah poossies." Right to my face. As he was walking out of the stadium with his team down 2 and at bat. Seriously pathetic.

Philly fans get a bad rap, but there is not segment of our fan base that rivals these guys. There's no fan base anywhere in the US that rivals these guys...except the Raiders. And guess what football team Dodgers thugs root for...